Feelings…

All this year I spent it grieving the lost of my ex, he was my world for pass three years I built a solid relationship alongside him just to see it come tearing down when I needed him the most.I look back to the last 12 months and I’m amazed to see where I’m at now.For crying all the month of January and February from hating myself thru it and trying to work it out thru March and April and into May .I held on to hope hard ,I thought maybe we would reconnect on our birthdays June diminished in front of my eyes. And July shattered my soul in that fact that you were moving on.I quote no I don’t want you waiting for me.August and September I focused on rebuilding as I was hit by cyber bullying by my ex’s new girlfriend .October my worst fear came to life seeing him with that girl for the first time I’ll admit I cried at that park that night god that feeling sucked the life out of me that night and many after that.I struggled with encounters of running into him and her.November I faced it and I was okay.I started to be happier loving myself .I was starting to feel whole again I missed that feeling.Ill admit today I had a nervous breakdown doubting myself feeling fearful for new feelings for new experiences .i want all those new things I really do.But I’m fearful I’m fearful of feelings I want the universe to guide me and I want to have a positive mindset that things are gonna work out like my friend isabel says things are rigged in your favor they are they just are.

❤️❤️❤️

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